Face vs. Ass

Yeah, this is me, from my sorority pic in college. You know – the array of photos that shows all the gals in the sorority. It’s called a composite, in case that’s a detail you ever need.

And yes, that’s my natural hair color.

I started to clean it up, but I need to be writing, not photo-shopping. And I just wanted to show it to you, my dear blog-gobblers, because of how young I look.

I’ve reached the age where photographs of my younger self look distinctly different than my self of today. That wasn’t true for a very long time. Suddenly I’m noticing that dewy complexion and perfectly taut skin that just isn’t quite so much so these days. Not that I think I look old by any stretch.

But I don’t look dewy, either.

I don’t know if it’s apocryphal or not, but there’s supposedly a French saying that as a woman ages she must choose between her face and her ass.

This is a succinct way of saying that you either get to be skinny or have a youthful face, not both. That’s because subcutaneous fat – that luscious layer under the skin – is what makes us look young. In some ways I like my face of today better, because I always minded the chubbiness of my cheeks then. Suddenly I have cheekbones. And yet I weigh overall, significantly more than I did then.

Ah, to reclaim my 20-year old behind.

It how we age, that we lose fat in our faces first. A woman who viciously diets to maintain that tiny posterior raids the fat in her face. You wonder why the Hollywood actresses are forever getting “plumpers” (lips, cheeks, foreheads), while you’re thinking that plumping injections would be about #50 on your plastic surgery wish list? That’s why. They’ve worked so hard to have the super-skinny, no-fat bodies, that their faces get that weird, dry look. It’s really just skin over bone at that point.

Not a youthful look.

So my point, and I do have one, is that choosing the face isn’t such a bad thing. After all, there’s lots of ways to drape the ass. When I occasionally fret that I’m not as skinny as I could be, I give thanks for the elasticity of my skin, for the fat under my skin that keeps it smooth and vital.

It might not be dewy, but it’s not parchment either. I’ll take it.

12 Replies to “Face vs. Ass”

  1. I love you! LOL

    I look at pictures from high school and college and go "I thought I was fat! I looked good, what the hell was wrong with me!" I'm bigger than I was in those days, but I don't think I look as old as some people my age. Of course, having chubby cheeks helps 😉 So…I think I'm going to choose face.

  2. *sighs* I miss the dewy days, too.

    But you know what? I figure in another ten years I'm going to look back my current pics and think, gee, I looked pretty good then–why didn't I appreciate it more? So I'm trying to be kinder to myself. 🙂

  3. You gals crack me up – we ALL choose Face!!

    I totally agree on appreciating how you look now, Linda and Danica. I do the same thing – look back at myself when I thought I looked awful and wonder what my problem was. SO important to remember that and be kind to ourselves.

  4. I'd give up my ass AND my face, just to have the spine I had back in high school. You know, the one that wasn't a broken mess. To put it in perspective, I'm 36. Doc says I have the spine of someone who is 55. Yay.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.